Have it ever hit you so bad that you’re too late to do anything?
I guess many never knew how terrifying can the word comfort be as much as it is the ultimate goal for most of us in life. Being where I am right here right now, am suddenly halfway in the quicksand of comfort and safety striving to decide whether should I cocoon myself into the warm fuzzy feeling of my warm little box of hand drawn circle or to grab on that hand pulling me into that fascinating but scary enchanted forest. Into the unknown.
Easier said than done. I suddenly find realization on how true the clichéd quotes can be.
“The more you’re afraid to do something, the more reasons you should go ahead and do it.”
“It’s better to have do it and face failure; than to face regret of not doing it”
I’d always assure myself that I’ll have my chance. I have tons of time. It’s okay to wait awhile more. I delayed. I procrastinate. I evade. I ran. Until one day when I realized that it’s not the fault of the situation but the weakness of the will and passion I had. The fear of dissapointing my loved ones the fear of failure. The fear for being the cause of disaster.
My mind was so enveloped by the conventional thinking of responsibility that it’s okay for me to mellow down my fighting fire, step aside and let the younger more potential ones take on while I prepare the nest.
I used to feel that I’d be fine as I can still earn and be worthy. But year after year i feel like part of me died. My fighting part. My dynamic self. My charisma. My spirit. What do I know of life if everything was provided and all things stagnant that I only push through everything with the instinct to survive.
Yes I know real gloomy emo post. ⚡☔
But I am grateful to God that I have two strong pillars in my life that has been drilling into my brains on the importance of taking one step ahead. It has been one heck of a frustrating period for them to finally see results; which I feel super bad for having them go through this. I hope they will never give up on me nor judge me for my actions. Not forgetting friends who continuously encourages and convinces me to never be afraid and that everybody has flaws. You know who all of you are.
Before I go back being Courage the Lion, I need to take that one step and things will always be better eventually.
Start moving forward.
And we can’t stop.
And we won’t stop.
There’s no turning back.
It’s never too late. NEVER.
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